Sunday, February 13, 2011

Tips on what not to do this Valentine's Day


We give you tips on what not to do this V-Day. 


1. If you are thinking of proposing to the one you love on Valentine's Day, then boy, do we have news for you. The idea is not only a hundred years old, but it borders on the lines of being lame. 


2. If you think imposing a life-sized stuffed teddy bear (unless your eye candy is ten years old) or a ginormous red heart on the recipient of your affection is going to get you brownie points, think again. Get a life... and some originality, perhaps? 


3. You like this girl but the very thought of approaching her makes you sweat. So you decide very intelligently to send her a red rose as a sign of your love. She's going to toss it away with nary a thought. Welcome to the 21st century. Good morning. Grow some guts. 


4. The rose is not the only flower in the world. Other flowers do exist. Orchids, maybe? 


5. If you expect someone to gift you something, stop dropping annoying, confusing hints. In these times, there's nothing wrong in spelling it out! 


6. You've promised the person in question, a surprise dinner. But if you plan to do it with chocolates, cheese and wine, don't expect her to be surprised. They are the biggest clichés. Think of more innovative wine-and-dine options. 


7. If you're out partying, avoid going to the DJ and dedicating a song to her. Because, you're certainly not the only one who's going to be doing that. 


8. If the movie theatres and the beach are filled with loved-up, PDA-indulging couples every February 14, it is because 90 per cent of the city's populace lacks originality. Get wacky! Take her zorbing, or if movies it has to be, take her to a gory, thriller... girls these days totally dig it. 


9. On Valentine's Day, scores of simpletons, err, singletons roam popular public spaces in anticipation of snagging a date. How? Somehow! Well, get proactive! Plan ahead and strategise... may the best man (or even woman) win at that. 


10. If you happen to see a girl wearing green, don't randomly assume she's single, just because the stupid V-Day rule book says so. For all you know, her mother might have picked out the top for her that morning and look behind you, is that her mean 'n' muscley boyfriend advancing towards you? 


11. A love note does not necessarily have to say 'I love you' in as many words. Express your feelings in a less dim-witted manner! 


12. Don't wish your teachers, colleagues and other random people on V-Day! It is plain weird. OK, so you do love them, but this is not the day to tell them. 


13. Just because the day is associated with red, you don't necessarily have to gallivant around the city looking like Santa Claus. In fact, the less red you wear, the better! 


14. Finally, take an oath not to forward corny V-Day messages to everyone on your contact list. It takes the love out of the day, to read a nonsensical, sappy ode, first thing in the morning

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